This past week has seen me compose and post tributes in the memory of my beautiful sister Val and also for my darling daughter Erin; they will both live on in my heart for evermore.
This past week has been very stressful at times due to some very difficult but unavoidable situations.
These situations did indeed open up many old wounds and my level mindset became jumbled for a while.However as always we do get through these hard times and this week has left me with an even stronger wish than ever to share my days whether good or bad so that hopefully my story will carry on helping others.
Sharing bad times is as important as sharing good ones ; so that others may know that it is alright to sob your heart out at times and then also on the other hand it's alright to have fun and a laugh also.
At one point a couple of days ago I felt that the adjustment I had gone through had unravelled and I would never return to that point again.
However ' never say never' is a favourite saying of mine and also rings true as yesterday I felt my usual positive mode kicking in once more.
What have I learnt from this dificult time??
Is there a lesson to be learnt ??
Of course without a single doubt there are lessons to be learnt each and everyday while we are on this earth.
I have learnt that there is no time limit for grieving and it is perfectly natural for us at times to feel such a deep grief whether it be 10 years , 20 years or even longer since our loved ones passed over.
The anchor that I hang onto at these times is an anchor of 'expectance and acceptance.'
My heart and soul open wider each time and I am also able to feel and then to share these feelings clearer through a new strength which I always gain along my way.
Here is a poem which I composed yesterday afternoon.
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MY BUTTERFLY FROM HEAVEN
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I sit in deep silence
Pained from within
But I sure know by now
That each day I will win.
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A week of weariness
Oh so tinged with pain
Will I be better off ??
Will there be much gain ??
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I felt a tender flutter
Making me turn around.
To see a precious butterfly
Circling without sound.
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Along the whole length
Of a sleek sliver thread.
I felt each sweet word
"You must share!" they read.
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Oh yes I understood
As I felt a deep pain
I had to free my heart
To sing in the rain.
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I must share my pain
While walking my journey.
To help others along
Many pained and lonely.
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Thank you sweet butterfly
I know who you are.
You will lead my way
As a great shining star.
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Oh yes my sweet baby
You are here by my side.
Come here safely to me
Into my heart open wide.
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I can now walk on by
With a heart much lighter.
I will continue to share
My horizons much brighter.
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If you wish to join me
As I walk my way.
I will always be here
Today and every day.
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Take care and God Bless you all.
You are so inspirational Eddy, to go back down that pain laden road and return with even more love and a positive mindset - amazing !!! Beautiful poetry, beautiful butterfly, so much courage in adversity - yes, expectance and acceptance a great life motto!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you so very muich Annie ;you have become such a great friend and your words always mean more than I can say.
DeleteEddy.